A storm front was moving in from the southwest--a common thing this time of year in southern Indiana. The wind had picked up as I sat on the porch swing wrapped in a blanket eating my salad, as I listened to our country church service on this Wednesday evening. I had decided to stay home and watch the live feed.
Crying would come upon me sporadically and unpredictably that day, so being around people would be difficult. We had made arrangements to have our Little Star put down. Little Star was our little Arabian horse who was one of our very best friends. She was diagnosed with cancer last fall. After much prayer, trusting in Jesus that we had made the right decision, we decided this spring was the time to help her walk on.
I wrapped the blanket around me tighter as the temperature began to drop and I decided to go on into the house and get a warmer blanket while I waited for my husband to get home.
My son and sister had spent the evening with me. We sat on the front porch steps and ate popcorn while we visited and talked about all sorts of things. They were good to comfort me when a crying spell would overtake me.
Later that night I went back and forth from the bed to the recliner. I listened to the thunder roll in with each new front and the heavy rain. I watched the white curtain softly blow in the cool breeze as it drifted through our home.
I awoke in my bed with my husband awake and staring at the ceiling. The windows were open, the sky was overcast and the birds were singing. The breeze was rustling the new spring leaves on the trees in our yard. The smell of coffee was adrift on the air, today was the day of great heartache for our family and great release for Star.
She left us at 2:45 p.m.
Mist was falling from the sky when we arrived at the barn. All six horses ate their breakfast quietly. The chickens made their way around cleaning up any spilled horse feed, the new kittens nursed behind the round bale, and sparrows would dart through the barn like quiksilver.
After I brushed out manes, I sat in the barn aisle next to Stars stall. She ate hay while I drank hot, chamomile tea.
The morning was spent and noon was upon us. Star, now grazed alone in the east pasture. All others were back in the barn. We shared lunch--a sandwich, half now, the other half later. She grazed next to a wild turkey setting her eggs in the raspberry thicket.
The time had come. My husband walked her over to the blossoming raspberry hedge and white, freshly budded field flowers and waited.
After the barn animals had been vetted by Dr. Bartlett (of Stone Ridge Equine Care), whom I trust with our horses completely, I walked Dr. Bartlett out into the pasture and kissed my Little Star goodbye. I told her how much I loved her for the thousandth time, and walked into the barn and stood with Fire.
Fire nuzzled me while Little Star fell into lush green pastures surrounded by love and birds singing. A gentle breeze filled with the scent of raspberry blossoms caressed her flowing mane.
I like to think that our Little Star now carries an angel on her back while together they patrol the earth, that her pain is gone and the victory is hers as she serves the King of kings. (Zechariah 6:7)
Thank you for the read and may God bless you.
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